Breaking the silence: A guide to help men get the care they need

Men often receive the message that showing pain and needing help reveals weakness. This harmful stigma has kept many men from seeking physical and mental health care, often leading to more serious health conditions. 

When looking at recent health trends, it’s evident that helping men get the care they need is more important than ever. Heart disease remains the top health concern for men over age 20, with more than 50% of men experiencing hypertension. Following close behind heart-related conditions are cancer and accidental injuries. Studies also show significant levels of men's mental health issues, including stress, anxiety, loneliness, and depression — conditions that are manageable or alleviated with care and support.

Prioritizing men’s health begins with understanding the unique challenges they face and working to remove the stigmas of seeking care. Whether it’s staying on top of preventive care or tapping into mental health support, Stanford’s benefits and programs are here to help you take steps toward long-term health and well-being.

Understanding the challenges

When it comes to seeking physical and mental health care, men face a broad range of challenges that are often rooted in cultural and social expectations. Throughout their lives, some men are taught that showing vulnerability is a weakness, and they quickly learn to stay silent in times of struggle. These pressures may be even more complex for men of color, trans men, queer men, men with disabilities, and male caregivers who often face additional layers of stigma and discrimination. Fearing being judged or perceived as weak can create internal barriers to seeking support, especially for mental health issues.

Additionally, a lack of awareness and education about physical and mental health conditions can prevent men from recognizing when to seek care. With the chaos of work and day-to-day life, self-care often gets put on the back burner. While there are many other factors that influence health, acknowledging these challenges is the first step in empowering men to take charge of their well-being. 

Breaking down the barriers

Changing this pattern starts with a shift in mindset. True strength is in overcoming internal assumptions, as it requires courage to ask for help. This begins on a personal level by challenging stigmas and embracing vulnerability as a vital part of well-being. For those who seek to support, a great way to start breaking down these barriers is to talk to the men in your life and encourage open conversations that normalize these difficulties. Men can also be encouraged to look to male role models, such as experts, authors, podcast hosts, and athletes, who are advocating for holistic health and well-being. By creating a safe space for support, we can build a culture that celebrates seeking help for future generations.

Take practical steps to improve your health

For men who haven’t been getting regular physical and mental health care, it can feel daunting to know where to start. The good news is that there are several simple steps you can take. Even just taking action in one area of your health can have a big impact on your overall well-being. 

• Schedule preventive screenings. If it’s been a while since you’ve had a checkup, you’re not alone. According to The Cleveland Clinic, more than 40% of men only go to the doctor when they have a serious medical condition. Because delaying care can lead to more serious health conditions, it’s important to see your primary doctor for a routine physical every year and keep up with age-appropriate screenings. For example, mammograms are recommended beginning at age 40 and colonoscopies at age 45. If you receive preventive care from an in-network provider, your Stanford medical plan covers the cost at 100%.
• Build healthy habits. Your nutrition, sleep, exercise, stress management, and relationships are all important building blocks to a healthy life, and Stanford offers a wide range of programs to assist you. Start by getting personalized support for your well-being through BeWell. You can also expand your knowledge in these Healthy Living classes:
  • Mood-Boosting Meals Made Simple (May 14): Take a virtual cooking class and learn how certain foods can significantly affect your mood, focus, and overall well-being.
  • Flip the Script on Stress (May 19): Rethink your view on stress and learn ways to feel calm, clear, and fulfilled.
  • A Comprehensive Approach to High Blood Pressure (on-demand): Learn about the evolving definition of what constitutes high blood pressure and explore non-drug strategies that can be combined with medications to effectively manage this disease.
• Expand your support network, even if nothing’s wrong. Consider proactively building your support network. Setting up regular check-ins with a counselor or trusted friend can make a big difference in your mental well-being. Building connections and belonging at work can also positively affect your well-being. Stanford offers programs, resources, and events where you can learn and engage with colleagues, and connect with our broader community.
• Get help with caregiving. You play an essential role in supporting your family member or loved one. Providing physical assistance, emotional support, management of medications, appointments, and finances can be exhausting, both physically and emotionally. Stanford offers a variety of support resources, including:
  • Respite adult care with Bright Horizons Back-Up Care.
  • A free 60-minute consultation with an Avendias clinical social worker specializing in gerontology.
  • Educational workshops such as Aging Wisely: Brave Agreements for Navigating. Delicate Conversations about Caregiving and Aging Among Multicultural Families and Significant Others (May 22), and more.
  • If you are also providing care for a child, Stanford offers a number of children and family resources, including on-site child care and dependent care financial assistance programs.
• Use your Stanford benefits and resources to support your physical and mental health. Your Stanford medical plan provides coverage for services that support your physical and mental health. Be sure to use your health savings account (HSA) or health care flexible spending account (FSA) to cover eligible health care expenses. Stanford also offers a broad range of mental health and emotional well-being resources, including free confidential counseling services at the Faculty Staff Help Center (for those near the Stanford Campus, SLAC, or Stanford Redwood City) and through SupportLinc for those out of state. If you’re enrolled in a Stanford health plan, you also have access to free online mental wellness support through Meru Health.